U.S.-Canada Cancer Patient Dating Service

This idea came to me, as so many good ideas often do, during a conversation with an intelligent, interesting woman. (Which is not to slam men. I occasionally have great ideas while talking with men as well.)

The woman is an expatriate American who is now a resident of Canada. In our conversation we ranged far and wide in cancer territory, and one subject that came up was the high cost of my health insurance and cancer care.

“Move to Canada,” she said, only half-joking.

From there the conversation segued into the idea of a dating service to match cancer patients north and south of the 49th parallel. We were joking, and I’m joking, sort of, when I put up the first ad (mine), but the whole idea makes a valid point:

If I lived about 150 miles north, in Vancouver, B.C., I would still be financially solvent, instead of having the stress of always teetering on the edge of bankruptcy. I also wouldn’t pay out almost $800 a month for health insurance that is slightly better than a barebones policy (and $15,000 to $20,000 annually in out-of-pocket medical costs). I’d call my policy a Honda Civic, as opposed to the Cadillac health insurance policies that public employees, including members of Congress, enjoy — at the taxpayers’ expense, I might add.

But I digress. The point is, if I married a Canadian, I would not longer have to worry about the high cost of cancer care. (See The (High) Cost of Cancer Treatment: I and The (High) Cost of Cancer Treatment: 2.

Thus, my personal ad:

Assertive, adventurous 52-year-old woman, living with incurable cancer, would like to meet a marriage-minded Canadian gent who is a cancer survivor or living with the disease.

Me: Writer, artist, teacher, well-known cancer blogger. Mother of two almost-grown sons (22 and 17). Vegetarian (but you don’t have to be). Loves animals (two large dogs and three cats), gardening, house projects. The beach. Books. Travel. Financially solvent except for absurdly expensive health insurance premiums and medical costs. Dislikes: Pink ribbons, chemotherapy, and unsolicited advice.

You: Age 45 to about 57. Canadian citizen living in Vancouver, B.C., or willing to relocate there. Cancer patient or survivor. Open-minded. Bit of a risk taker. Warm hearted but not clinging. Bald OK.

I’m not looking for a caretaker, and you shouldn’t be either. I am looking for a lover and new best friend.

Contact: [email protected] with photo.

A footnote: If I do marry a Canadian citizen, I expect the Canadian government to send George Bush, or whomever follows him into the Oval Office, a bill for the $300,000 annual cost of my cancer care.

Another footnote: If you’d like to join the U.S.-Canada Cancer Patient Dating Service, shoot me an e-mail: [email protected]

@ Jeanne Sather 2007.
Posted at 03:09 PM in Dating | Permalink

Technorati Tags: Canada, cancer, cancer patient, cost of cancer treatment, dating service, health insurance, United States

i am not one for IM/internet slanguage but this time, an exception: LMAO!

p.s. i look great in mid-length pink taffeta, you know, just in case this all works out….

Posted by: jessica | August 26, 2007 at 04:58 PM

Wonderful! You get that dating service started, and I will start up the career-switching service (we should all be able to switch to the jobs we REALLY love after surviving cancer). I have a bit of psychic in me, and I see your story being a great book/movie someday, with Glenn Close playing you, and Pierce Brosnan playing the Canadian…

Posted by: Teresa Hartman | August 26, 2007 at 07:45 PM

That’s hilarious. I also love Jessica’s idea about the pink taffeta — with big pink ribbon sashes? Should they also carry bouquets trailing pill bottles and little plastic dollar signs? And what will the groom’s men wear? Will that depend on what kind of cancer he has?

I am intrigued by your specifying that you want a man who is also a cancer patient or survivor. Why?

Posted by: Sara | August 27, 2007 at 05:01 AM

LOL! I have said many times that I feel very fortunate to live in Canada, with its universal health care.
If the dating thing doesn’t work out (although I think it’s a brilliant idea, and could be fun), perhaps you could lead the charge for Washington to become the 11th Canadian province? Our our fourth territory?

Posted by: laurie | August 27, 2007 at 07:36 AM

Thanks everyone for all the great comments. If I do find a Canadian groom, I will invite all my blogging friends to be bridesmaids in pink taffeta with huge butt bows–apparently the butt bow is VERY important to bridesmaids’ dresses. And the groom and his groomsmen will have to wear the right color–pale blue if he has had prostate cancer, for the others we may have to make up a color.

Sara asked why I want a man who is a cancer survivor, and the reason is that I think a man who has gone through this will understand some of the realities of my life. That doesn’t mean I would refuse a healthy guy (I don’t think I would, anyway).

Washington state (or the western half, anyway) should become part of Canada. That would be great–I wouldn’t even have to move.


Posted by: jeanne | August 27, 2007 at 10:05 AM

that is funny. I am currently trying to whip up a whitty way to complain about my insurance. I’ll let you know when I figure it out.

LEt me know how the dating service goes.

Posted by: Lisa | August 27, 2007 at 07:47 PM

Lisa–what’s wrong with your insurance? Did you read Sara’s post about applying for health insurance? I’ll find the link and send it to you.

Posted by: jeanne | August 27, 2007 at 08:41 PM


Don’t worry my insurance prob is not so bad, more ironic – which is why I am thinking about posting about it. I’ll let you know when I do, as I think you’ll get a kick out of it.

Posted by: Lisa | August 28, 2007 at 01:00 PM

Of course I want to hear about it. The more examples we can put out there, the better.


Posted by: jeanne | August 28, 2007 at 01:10 PM

The sad part about Canadian health coverage is that Rik’s family always said if he’d still been living in Canada when he had to have open heart surgery, he’d still be waiting for it….

But I’m up for a pink ribbon butt bow if you find that special someone!

Posted by: Jill | August 28, 2007 at 10:08 PM

Jill–you are second in line for a pink taffeta butt bow, behind Jessica, who suggested that part of the whole party.

That would be pretty wild.

So far, quite a few women friends have weighed it, but no men, Canadian or otherwise. Where are they hiding?


Posted by: jeanne | August 29, 2007 at 09:04 AM

uh oh! i overlooked any correlation of the pink taffeta and breast cancer ribbons! totally not my intent… mostly i was just thinking ugly, 80s, destined for future life on a thrift store rack. my mind’s eye sees that in a deeper pink, but if you want to flip the proverbial bird to exploitation, i can accommodate paler shades as well.

now lets work at getting your ad to the top of the search engines, shall we?

Posted by: jessica | August 31, 2007 at 02:12 AM