Broken Bones

So this is really fun.

I FINALLY had a phone conversation with Dr. Lee about my scans from November 5 and 8 yesterday (I had called him earlier in the week, but he hadn't gotten back to me). And, it turns out, I had a fracture in the pelvis, the pubic bone, actually, in the area where the met was that I had radiated in September.

This fracture had not shown up on the bone scan I had before treatment started, but it explains why the pain didn't stop after I began radiation, as my radiation oncologist had told me it would. It also explains why the pain continued for so long--more than two months, including the three weeks I was undergoing radiation.

Now I am kicking myself for being so stoic about the pain.

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

It is true that I told my doctors, every time I saw them, that the groin area still hurt. But maybe I didn't make it clear how much it still hurt.

I wondered if there was something going on there, other than irritated soft tissues, that was making it hurt. That's why I was glad to have the bone scan and PET/CT earlier this month.

And it was those scans that showed that I have a healing fracture in that area. I also have a broken rib or two, which only really started hurting this week, but boy did/do they hurt. That's the pain I was dealing with yesterday.

So I'll be back at the radiation oncologist's on Monday, doing a set-up for yet another round of radiation, this time to the broken rib. I'm also getting an MRI early Monday morning to look at the tumors in my spine, at T-5 anf T-6 to make sure they aren't big enough to do me any harm.

Then, there is the Tykerb battle. My Tykerb is now lost in the bowels of the computers at Medco's specialty pharmacy. Until the computer spits it out, I can't schedule delivery. But I can't call and schedule delivery. The call has to come from Medco. Go figure.

Because of the Pain
Because of the pain, I canceled my birthday lunch with my friend Jill. Well, rescheduled, really. Jill and I both have metastatic breast cancer, and our birthdays are two days apart, so for the past three years, we've been having lunch on November 16, the day between our two birthdays, to celebrate the great ages we are living to, despite having metastatic disease.

We joke that we are the only two women in Seattle who celebrate getting older. And we do.

But this put a crimp in things. I knew I couldn't comfortably sit for an hour at a restaurant, plus I've been busy setting up all my appts. for next week and trying to wrassle the Tykerb folks.

Also canceled my scrub at the women's bathhouse tonight. I don't want anyone putting that much pressure on any part of my body right now. But if I can make it to 5:30 in one piece (relatively, anyway), I will still go along and soak. That will feel good.

Read: Inside a Women's Bathhouse

@ Jeanne Sather 2007.

Comments

[Carver]

Dear Jeanne,

I am so sorry for all you are going through. It's weird but I had another friend who had a similar situation. She had cancer (melanoma) that spread to her bones and she was stoical and it turned out they were broken. I hope that you can get some relief soon. Our birthdays are close together. I had my 50th on November 11th in Manhattan. I'm so sorry you couldn't have lunch with your friend but hopefully you can rain check on it.

As ever, Carver

[jeanne]

Carver--happy birthday! Next year, I'll know that you are a November birthday as well.

Jill and I rescheduled our lunch. Better to do it when I can enjoy myself.

And I need to be less stoic about pain, obviously. But when you tell a doctor something really hurts, and they do nothing ... Well, I haven't figured that one out yet, except that I need to call the shots. Guess that's obvious.

Maybe I'm still being a "good patient," although I thought I had gottenr id of that years ago.

[Amorette]

What a mess.

Why do they not LISTEN?

:/

[Amy]

I feel bad that I didn't check up on you! I was worried about you but I just stewed. I m very sorry you're hurting. Also, waiting for the drug. My husband told me a story yesterday that his doctor told. A patient needed a drug but insurance didn't approve until AFTER the window passed that it would have helped...Things need to change!

[laurie]

This post made me swear out loud (and then explain to my nine year old that "fuck" is only appropriate during the most egregious of circumstances).
Fuck about the Tykerb.
And fuck about the pain. I put the blame squarely at your doctors' feet. If you say you are in pain, they should take it seriously. You shouldn't have to be screaming and crying for them to understand that you mean it.
I am so sorry.

[jeanne]

Amy--I have been wondering: If I had started on the Tykerb two weeks ago, would it have made a difference? Would this rib maybe not have broken? It's too weird.

And Laurie, thanks. I agree. There must be something about the way that I say "It hurts, it hurts a lot" that doesn't get through. (Not that I am blaming myself, my doctors should have checked it out when the pain continued this long.)

But on my end, I was so worn out with the pain that I didn't have the energy to push ...

So I'm sitting here with a broken rib, with a rib brace from the drugstore, waiting for Monday, when I will get an MRI of my spine and then see my radiation oncologist. It sounds like I am going to start another round of radiation on Monday.

In between, I'll be calling the Tykerb people, demanding my drug.

[Sara]

Argh! Ow ow ow!

I wish you speedy relief.

[Wendy]

Happy Belated Birthday!!! Please let me know if there is anything I can help you with ok??? I care!